An intelectual post

First time I heard about paraprosdokians, I liked them. 
Paraprosdokians are figures of speech in which the latter part of a sentence or phrase 
is surprising or unexpected and is frequently humorous.  (Winston Churchill loved them)

1. Where there’s a will, I want to be in it.

2. The last thing I want to do is hurt you … but it’s still on my list.

3. Since light travels faster than sound, some people appear bright until you hear them speak.

4. If I agreed with you, we’d both be wrong.

5. We never really grow up — we only learn how to act in public.

6. War does not determine who is right, only who is left.

7. Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit. Wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad.

8. To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism. To steal from many is research.

9 I didn’t say it was your fault, I said I was blaming you.

10. In filling out an application, where it says, “In case of emergency, notify… ” I answered ” a doctor.”

11. Women will never be equal to men until they can walk down the street with a bald head and a beer belly, and still think they are sexy.

12. You do not need a parachute to skydive. You only need a parachute to skydive more than once.

13. I used to be indecisive, but now I’m not so sure.
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