8 Thoughts

EIGHT THOUGHTS TO PONDER:
 
Number 8

Life is sexually transmitted.

Number 7

Good health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die.

Number 6

Men have two emotions : Hungry and Horny.

 
They can’t tell them apart.
 
If you see a gleam in his eyes, make him a sandwich.

Number 5

Give a person a fish and you feed them for a day.

 
Teach a person to use the Internet and they won’t bother you for weeks, months, maybe years.

Number 4

Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in the hospitals,

 
dying of nothing.

Number 3

All of us could take a lesson from the weather.

 
It pays no attention to criticism.
 

Number 2

In the 60’s, people took acid to make the world weird.

 
Now the world is weird and people take Prozac to make it normal.
 

And The Number 1 Thought 

Life is like a jar of Jalapeno peppers–what you do today, might burn your arse tomorrow.

 

– – – and as someone recently said to me:
“Don’t worry about old age – it doesn’t last that long.”

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